Shippings
by Evide
Summary: Well...some host members think that the Hitachiincest is too overused, while some others think opposite. And now, they've made a bet out of it... HikaKao, some KaoKyo, slight crossover


Well... this is my very first Ouran ficcy! Woot! The style is very unlike anything I've written before... unless you count the pointless dialogue between the dragons in my head... But, besides that, I think this came out pretty well. It starts out kinda... loopy... and... well... it's got no real point. It's a fun little fic! I loved writing it! I'm sooo glad I got this out! Ahh!

Pairings: cannon-based pairs... and a little Kyoya-Kaoru suggestion, but not much. Maybe if you squint your eyes...

Warnings: too much insanity? Random acts of Romance? A popping gun? Sound like my kind of violence!

Disclaimer: Hm... Ouran... well... lets see... ah... no. Nope, don't own this anime either. Darn.

Shippings War!!

Ouran Side—-

"Me and Kaoru are MEANT for eachother!" Hikaru screeched as darkly as possible, trying not to sound childish but in the end, his angry emotions flared from his mouth just like fictional dragons' fire.

"Sorry, Hikaru. But the way things are planned out, you and your brother, as a pair, is just too overused. You have been doing 'forbidden brotherly love' for your whole time in Ouran. It's time for something... more interesting." Kyoya muttered over his notebook, his deathly Shadow-Lord stare making Hikaru cringe despite himself.

"Are you saying me and Kaoru are uninteresting? It's you all whose so boring! Forbidden love— that's never boring!" It seemed that Hikaru and Kyoya were up against eachother in a death-match and Hani and Mori both started to put up Boxing Rings around the two to match their fighting aura.

"I am just stating the facts— the Hikaru and Kaoru shipping is overused and dull. Your scripts are repeating themselves more often than not. It would be so much more satisfying if there were something a little different for you both." Kyoya was suggesting something, but Hikaru wasn't catching on. Him and Kaoru were a team!

"Me and Kaoru do everything together! Tamaki-senpai elected us as so!" Hikaru pointed to the Idiot Lord in desperation, and Tamaki instantly held his hands up in defence, screeching.

"Don't get me involved in this, Hikaru! It was Okaasan's plan! Okaasan's!" To try and comfort himself, Tamaki instantly latched onto his daughter and snuggled into her hair, appreciative of the lack of twin devils at his side.

"Ack! Tamaki-senpai..." Haruhi whined, not enjoying Tamaki's clinging-ness

"Ahem, Tamkai is correct." Kyoya ignored the father-daughter scene in front of him, "It is also my idea that me and Kaoru share a scene."

Sudden dead white room... no sound... tenseness overwhelming...

"Kaoru...and Kyoya...?" Tamaki's arms slowly unhooked from around Fujioka (thank goodness, she sighed) as the idiot lord's inner mind theatre tried to compose itself to let him imagine...

—_Kyoya stood perfectly still, a red-haired wig draped over dark locks while a flowing Ouran School uniform wardrobe adorned his body, his glasses glinted white, hiding away dark eyes. Kaoru was dressed the same, and they mildly resembled eachother, even though it was still noticeable that Kyoya was still five or more inches taller than his 'counterpart'._

_And while Kyoya stood perfectly still, his red-haired 'other' skipped circles around him, throwing rose petals around the silent boy in a very uke-like fashion. Kyoya made no attempt at all to stop Kaoru's rambunctious acts as he continued to skip and played off of lines like..._

"_Kyoya, you just stand there so still! I'm sorry if you feel sore from last night..." (Said with Kaoru's hand under his chin as if he was about to bite his knuckle in a very 'I'm a very insecure and unloved and ashamed uke...')_

"_Do you not love me Kyoya? You won't even answer me! You just ignore me!" (Said with a few angry tear-drops glistening in Kaoru's eyes as his shoulders pulled together in a very effeminately angry way)_

"_Kyoya, I hurt my hand... you're a doctor, will you not fix me?" (This, Kaoru said while placed suggestively at Kyoya's side, holding up a hand with no visible marks on it, and his eyes as pleading as a newborn puppy's)_

_and other random uke-lines that tried to fit into Kyoya's rather non-active playing. All in all, they were very bad and otherwise cliche lines and the only appeal to the whole thing was Kaoru's bright blush and the rose petals dancing around the two—-_

"Stop! Stop the inner mind theatre, Tono!!" Hikaru lunged at his lord and effectively rung his hands around Tamaki's neck in threat of death, shaking him back and forth.

"Ah! Takashi, Tama-chan is being hurt by Hika-chan!" Hani said in his small, upset voice, sending out Mori to wrestle Hikaru away from the blue-faced Tamaki-senpai, who tried once again to console himself in Haruhi's presence, whom tried to push him away to make a statement.

"Tamaki, please let me go!" Haruhi gave a hard shove and the lord instantly slid over to a corner to sulk, little clouds appearing over his head. "If this matter is so important, than why not ask for Kaoru's opinion?"

Ah... that might be a good idea.

"Yes! Kaoru will vouch for me!" Hikaru gave a 'v-for-victory' sign and instantly set his golden eyes searching... but his twin, his mirror could not be found. "Ack! Kaoru! Kaoru? Where'd you go! Kaoru!" Hikaru was set running in circles and Haruhi had to grab his collar from smashing into a bookshelf, sighing to herself.

"Will you calm yourself down already, Hikaru!" He did calm, but only for his eyes to flash dangerously and he suddenly pounced upon Kyoya, who stepped to the side to avoid any physical contact that would have resulted in a crash.

"Where is he! You did something, didn't you? Where's Kaoru? Where's my twin!" Hikaru grasped Kyoya's shirt with such force and anger that it sent the elder boy's body shaking from the other's arms.

Kyoya's glasses flashed, "I am sorry that you cannot keep a better eye on your significant other."

And then there were Boxing Rings up around them again and Tamaki suddenly dove in, proclaiming to try and save his dear Okaasan from the unruly behavior of their son (but doing a body slam onto them wasn't really the most expert way of trying to get the two to break apart).

Hani made quick work of the fight and soon, the three boys were sitting before him with mild scratches and bruises from the fight, looking at him eye-level (as they were on the ground, and Hani was such a small person).

"Why don't you all quit fighting and work together to find Kao-chan! What if he's in trouble?" Hani sniffed and soon, Mori was by his side, ruffling his hair and glaring at Tamaki and Hikaru as Kyoya stood up and adjusted his disheveled uniform.

"I concur with Hani-senpai. We shall need to find Kaoru to settle this matter." Kyoya wrote a note in his notebook and Hikaru just glared at his back.

"Fine! We'll split up and search the grounds, and—"

Suddenly, the ground began to quake, and an annoying "Oh-hohoho!" laugh echoed around the group as Renge appeared from help of her mechanical rotating floor.

"The next host to find Kaoru will share a lovely scene with him!!" Renge announced, effectively dropping all jaws to the ground.

"U-Um, is that really necessary?" Haruhi asked tentatively, not sure if she'd want to deal with both Hikaru's overly zealous anger at her for stealing Kaoru and also not wanting to deal with Kaoru's regular act of uke-devil if she were unlucky enough to find the younger twin first.

"Of course!" White petals sprung from Renge's elegant dress and she twirled around. "This is now a matter of love between all host club members! If Hikaru and Kaoru's hosting is now boring, then all shall have a chance at going at a different approach!"

"Hn." Mori 'hn'ed in a disapproving manner, probably to state that it was bad to think of Kaoru as just an accessory, but no one understood accept faithful Hani.

"Hika-chan and Kyo-chan shouldn't use Kao-chan like bun-bun!" Hani held up his cake crumb-covered pink bunny for show, but none were sure where the adorable third-year was coming from.

"Uh, right..." Tamaki cringed from Hani's innocent-looking sad face, as if afraid he would turn 'dark' at any moment.

Renge clapped her hands and held out a popping gun high in the air, declaring, "On your maaaark!" Suddenly, the host club members were scrambling into a perfect line, some more or less enthusiastic about doing it. "Get seeeeet!" Everyone seemed to tense a little. "GOOO!"

_Pop!_

"HAH! I'll beat you all! I know my twin like the backside of my hand! I know him like I know myself!" and off rushed Hikaru to the library.

"Maybe Kao-chan went to get something to eat...?" Hani said quizzically, and off he skipped with Mori at his side to wander into the kitchen, as usual.

"No, Kaoru, being noble and uke, would find somewhere to seclude himself!" Tamaki, feeling enboldened, started to rummage through the Ouran closets.

"I'll check the roof..." Haruhi muttered, wandering slowly up towards the stairwell, not giving Kyoya another glance. The dark-haired junior just pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose and started to walk outside. His feet carried him not far, down into the rosebush maze that Tamaki and Haruhi had played Hide-and-go-Seek in. In the back, there was a small Pumpkin Patch, and sure enough, a heavy-lidded Kaoru was hunched over one of them.

Slowly and quietly, Kyoya leaned down and settled a hand on the younger boy's shoulder. Kaoru's half-lidded eyes blinked open, and a soft sigh escaped him without thinking.

"Hikaru...?" He turned and sat up more, from his sleep-worthy position of laying over his pumpkin, to meet the glass-hidden eyes of Kyoya. "Kyoya...senpai?" Kaoru added the suffix in his sudden loss for any other address... he seemed so unsure without his brother's overpowering confidence at his side.

"As I suspected." Kyoya muttered, making a note in his book, which made Kaoru blink more.

"What did you suspect? Why are you here, Kyoya?" Kaoru's hands were gripping his orange prize as if it were going to help him with his problems.

"I suspected that you would be here, that is why I'm here." Kyoya held a hand to the redhead, who turned away stubbornly.

"I...I'm waiting for Hikaru!" He said defiantly, hugging his pumpkin closer.

"I understand. But you also have to understand something, Kaoru." Kyoya leaned in closer so he could whisper. "That pumpkin of yours... isn't a substitute for a carriage."

Kaoru pouted and curled around his fruit...vegitable...thing and stared forlornly at the wall of roses in front of him. "I'm waiting for Hikaru."

"To do what?" Kyoya asked, then went on, "What are you waiting for Hikaru to do? Maybe you should think about that before he comes looking for you here... it might be a while, he's in the library right now." and then Kaoru heard the footsteps walking away from him, fading into the background.

"Hmph."

"FIRE!!!!"

"Wha...!" Kaoru's head shot up at the sudden shout and his pumpkin was dropped unceremoniously on the ground as the redhead rushed over to the sudden cry.

"FIRE AGAIN!"

"Excuse m—"

"I SAID FIRE!"

Kaoru reeled back from the sudden passing of an apple near his head, and his hands went out to grip Hikaru's... only, his elder brother wasn't there beside him.

"Oh, I'm so so sorry. You're... wait, you're one of the Hitachiins!" A young girl with long blond hair suddenly rushed up to him and bowed in apology.

"I um... it's fine... um... what were you doing anyway?" Kaoru looked past the blond girl (with turquoise eyes that reminded him of Tamaki...) to set eyes an another young girl with brunette braided pigtails and a button-like face.

"We... we were just... um... it was Izumi-chan's idea!" The other girl said frantically, hiding behind her hands as they pulled up to her chest in embarrassment.

"What was?" Kaoru asked, looking at the blond in front of him, 'Izumi-chan'.

"Oh, yes. Sorry, sorry! Yes, I was the one with the brilliant idea of a shipping war."

"A...A what?" Kaoru stumbled back as the foreign girl suddenly leaned in closer.

"Now, which one of the twins are you? You're so uncomfortable without your brother that I bet you're Kaoru, ne!?" Izumi smiled then and went back to her friend to speak in some odd language to her, to which the other girl nodded.

"Ah... yes, I'm Kaoru. And...if you don't mind me asking, are you speaking French? It sure sounds like Tamaki's accent..."

"Oh no!" Izumi smiled again, seemingly the more dominant personality compared to her docile friend. "It's Italian, the language of love!" Izumi sighed dreamily and the other girl smiled wistfully.

"Oh." Then Kaoru bowed. "Excuse me. I did not catch your name, fair maiden." He stared into the brunette's deep brown eyes, slipping into a Tamaki-like confidence.

"O-oh..." She blushed and looked away. "Y-You can call me Chiaki, Kaoru-san."

"Chiaki, then." He smiled softly also, but now was at a loss as to how to host them without his brother.

"Don't worry yourself, Kaoru-san." Izumi waved him off and he straightened, puzzled. "You have no obligation to host us. Besides, we should be hosting you."

"Y-yes! Let us show you this..." Chiaki added and the two girls pulled at the relenting Kaoru's arms and he sat with them at the side of the Ouran pond, with the ugly angel spewing forth its nonsense water in the middle.

"We were using apples to fire at eachother, but I think that was a bad idea. Rubber balls next time, okay Chiaki?" Izumi smiled at her friend who nodded and picked up a finely crafted sail boat out of the lily-padded water and turned it over in her hands to rid it of access water.

"And fire!" Chiaki pulled out an apple from nowhere and shot it into the water at a nearly-identical, finely-crafted boat, making the water splash all over Kaoru and Izumi.

"That's it! This is war!" Izumi picked up her own basket of apples and threw three of them at the water so that it splashed up towards Chiaki.

"No! I'm telling you, Kyoya and Kaoru are a better pair!" Chiaki's face heated from her fight with Izumi, who both seemed so determined.

"And I'm telling _you_ that twin-taboo is the better love!" Izumi said wonderfully.

"Hold it, hold it, hold it!" Kaoru produced a stop sign and glared between the two girls, now his interest peaked. "What are you talking about?"

Izumi and Chiaki smiled a somewhat kind... somewhat strange... and somewhat scary-evil grin. They nodded at eachother before both latched onto opposite arms.

"We're debating what shipping you're most suitable for." Izumi said innocently, pulling on his arm.

"Of course, Orimoto-chan has always had a fetish for twins. She has even tried to pair up some brothers at an old commoner school she went to before Ouran." Chiaki added, pulling on Kaoru's arm as if to take him away from Izumi, who only pulled back again.

"Well, they were cute together! It would have been so much easier with a Host Club like Ouran's to help. And anyway, I don't see how Kyoya and Kaoru are cute." Izumi rolled her eyes at Chiaki who glared back with a small smirk.

"Well I think you actually fancy that Tamaki-kun for his foreign ways!" Suddenly, Kaoru landed on top of Chiaki as Izumi let go and turned a little pink... though it looked like it was more from anger than embarrassment.

"No! That baka Suoh-san can just go back to France for all I care!" Then she helped the confused Kaoru up to his feet and started to stroke his hair. "I think brotherly love should be cherished between twins..." Her voice was supposedly seductive, but something behind those words suggested that she had some kind of experience in what she was saying...

"R-right..." Kaoru stumbled away from the girl, holding up his hand. "Cherish our brotherly love. I'll remember that." His eyes traveled up towards the tall windows of Ouran, looking through the different windows of the Music rooms and the class rooms...

"You should go find him. I think he's looking for you." Izumi said sweetly and Chiaki came up to her side hesitantly.

"Yes... I suppose you've won for today, Izumi-chan." Chiaki smiled at Kaoru and the redhead did a small double-take before rushing up through the Ouran halls toward the library.

"Hm... sure does remind me of Kouichi-kun." Izumi mumbled offhandedly.

"The one brother you tried to get together with his own twin?" Chiaki asked.

"Tried? I not only tried. I succeeded. He's so cute with his younger brother all protective over him." Izumi sighed and then picked up a boat from the water.

"Twin taboo. Hm."

Kaoru ran frantically up the steps of the Ouran school, his panting only echoing inside his head even more frantically. His hands pumped through the air at his sides, then in front of him, then all over the place, as he seemed not very used to running without his twin at his side or pulling him along or something. The thought only spurred him on and he finally reached his destination, crashing through the library doors loudly.

"Hikaru!"

A book the the elder twin had been holding dropped to the floor in utter surprise. "Kaoru!"

Replay from Halloween that hadn't been held too long ago, the brothers embraced, calling out eachother's names simultaneously, wide smiles adorning their faces.

Hikaru stood back a bit to get a better look at his brother as soon as the rose-petal backdrop started to fade, and the elder smiled a wide, Chesire cat grin.

"Ha! I told Kyoya that I'd find ya."

"Did you now? But wasn't it I that actually found you?" Kaoru received a harmless swap up the side of his head.

"Yeah, well this wouldn't have been a problem if you'd been there to begin with. Where were you, eh?" Hikaru accused, his arms now falling to his side as he watched Kaoru pick up the dropped book.

"I was just... playing in my Carriage." Kaoru offered, smiling slightly. Hikaru didn't understand, and switched the topic to one he could.

"Well... Kyoya wanted to take away the brotherly love! He even wanted to share a scene with you! Eck!" Hikaru made a gruesome 'finger-down-his-throat' motion and the both chuckled a little as they headed out of the library together. "It would've been so boring without us as a shipping, ne?" Hikaru's hands found the back of his head and he happily and casually walked alongside his twin towards the third music room.

"A shipping..." Kaoru looked thoughtful, then laughed. "Yeah, it would've been boring!"

Hikaru smiled and flung an arm around his brother and Kaoru's unoccupied hand did the same and they came upon the Music room doors.

"On three?" Kaoru said.

"One."

"Two..."

"Three!" The both of them shouted simultaneously and they opened the door.

——The End!——

Very different style that regular... but then again... it seems to fit myself and the Anime well. And sorry about the change of style like halfway through. It went like "Woot, craziness" then suddenly to "oh my gosh... serious" kinda.

And if you liked this fic, then maybe you'd like some of my other stuff? Maybe not. Nah, you don't wanna know...

Oh yes, and there _were_ some elements from a different anime thrown in there! I couldn't help it. No Original Characters were used! Darn and my dragons wanted to come out to play...

So, I think Ouran will be something new to write about! It's definitely not so boring anymore (Hitachiin thinking). I think I'll write some more. Weee!


End file.
